Oh, I get it. A song about blow jobs (103) followed by a song about girls singing "our lips are sealed." You so funny PF500!!
This song always felt a about a half-beat slow to me. And the tune of the verses seems like it should be the tune of the chorus ("can you hear them"). And, during the chorus, nothing seems to be going on: "our lips are sealed" wait wait wait "our lips are sealed." The 3 seconds between those two lines are just soooo boring.
Then again, never has Belinda seemed so attractive.
RATING: 70
April 10, 2009
April 4, 2009
103. English Beat: Save It For Later
Yikes! "Save it Fellator" is in the liner notes. "Just hold my hand while I come ... to a decision on it." Nasty stuff. Who knew?
Multi-instrumental song with the piano, strings (and not just violins) kicking in over the jangly guitars right from the start, with the gregarious, confident vocal with background vocals doing interesting stuff; more than just filling space. Later the rhythm section takes it's turn, and then the sax. Even some "ch ch"'s!! A surprising amount of stuff going on here.
The last 45 seconds is just plain fun, with the various instruments (here comes the tambourine) and the different vocalists taking turns popping in and out to wind it up.
Their wikipedia page fails to even mention this song. Somebody get on that or Jimbo Wales will be pissed.
RATING: 81.
Multi-instrumental song with the piano, strings (and not just violins) kicking in over the jangly guitars right from the start, with the gregarious, confident vocal with background vocals doing interesting stuff; more than just filling space. Later the rhythm section takes it's turn, and then the sax. Even some "ch ch"'s!! A surprising amount of stuff going on here.
The last 45 seconds is just plain fun, with the various instruments (here comes the tambourine) and the different vocalists taking turns popping in and out to wind it up.
Their wikipedia page fails to even mention this song. Somebody get on that or Jimbo Wales will be pissed.
RATING: 81.
102. Duran Duran: The Chauffeur
Jesus. C'mon. This is the Duran Duran song?
This is spare artrock, with all the bad that goes along with that. Tinny handclaps; not much else. Nonsensical Simon Lebon Lyrics. My wife just mockingly tiptoed in here like a mouse.
At about 2:30, the flute kicking in is kinda cool and the bubbly synth, and the more complicated beat bring the song up. But it had a long way to go.
RATING: 51.
This is spare artrock, with all the bad that goes along with that. Tinny handclaps; not much else. Nonsensical Simon Lebon Lyrics. My wife just mockingly tiptoed in here like a mouse.
At about 2:30, the flute kicking in is kinda cool and the bubbly synth, and the more complicated beat bring the song up. But it had a long way to go.
RATING: 51.
101. The Jam: A Town Called Malice
Another post-punk band that feels like it has about 5% punk left in it.
PF500 rightly notes the strong 1960's Motown vibe coursing through this song, in the rhythm section (not to mention the hammond and handclaps). I've never really gotten The Jam. Take this song, what seems to me to be their biggest hit. I have a hard time seeing the difference between this song and much of the J. Geils Bands' catalogue. Then again, J Geils wasn't that bad.
The "Ba ba ba ba ba buh ba ... ba bap ba bap ba buh" is the best part.
RATING: It's from the sixties; it belongs in the sixties: 65.
PF500 rightly notes the strong 1960's Motown vibe coursing through this song, in the rhythm section (not to mention the hammond and handclaps). I've never really gotten The Jam. Take this song, what seems to me to be their biggest hit. I have a hard time seeing the difference between this song and much of the J. Geils Bands' catalogue. Then again, J Geils wasn't that bad.
The "Ba ba ba ba ba buh ba ... ba bap ba bap ba buh" is the best part.
RATING: It's from the sixties; it belongs in the sixties: 65.
100. New Order: Temptation
Another instance of PF500 nailing it and including the right song.
PF500 notes how New Order didn't fret over mixing Rock guitars with the synthesizers, they just did it, and it really works for them, creating a "ramshackle" song per PF500. Ramshackle really is a great word for this song.
Bernard Sumner did well to know that he wasn't Ian Curtis, and maybe nowhere do you feel that more than on this song, with his regular guy singing, regular guy joy and the trancey "woo oo oo oo oo"-ing, which is always what kicked this song up a notch for me, with the "green eyes/blue eyes/grey eyes" boosting it another notch. I've listened to this song more than once after being up all night, walking around at the crack of dawn. There isn't a prettier 6:30 a.m. song out there.
Extra long intros and outros give you time to ease into it and out of it for maximum effect.
RATING: 89.
Bernard was already becoming a bit rock starry by this performance, in which he is sporting excellent short pants:
PF500 notes how New Order didn't fret over mixing Rock guitars with the synthesizers, they just did it, and it really works for them, creating a "ramshackle" song per PF500. Ramshackle really is a great word for this song.
Bernard Sumner did well to know that he wasn't Ian Curtis, and maybe nowhere do you feel that more than on this song, with his regular guy singing, regular guy joy and the trancey "woo oo oo oo oo"-ing, which is always what kicked this song up a notch for me, with the "green eyes/blue eyes/grey eyes" boosting it another notch. I've listened to this song more than once after being up all night, walking around at the crack of dawn. There isn't a prettier 6:30 a.m. song out there.
Extra long intros and outros give you time to ease into it and out of it for maximum effect.
RATING: 89.
Bernard was already becoming a bit rock starry by this performance, in which he is sporting excellent short pants:
99. ABC: All of My Heart
My first thought hearing this is that it's the kind of song that couldn't be made today.
Anyone born 1978 or later doesn't really remember when life was 95% regular and 5% meta (instead of the 75% to 25% split we have today). A time when irony was reserved for O Henry stories and didn't impact your life on a daily basis. And how, around 1990, that pussy Cobain and that pussy Seinfeld and others came along and killed earnestness and banished it forever. I sometimes think those of us born between 1970 and 1974 are the lucky ones, we were raised with earnestness but got irony dropped into our personalities just before it was too late, ending up with a nice mixture of each.
This song is earnest in every way imaginable. Tinkly intro. Tesh-like vocals. Ridiculously corny lyrics:
This song is so earnest in lyrics, vocals and music that it can challenge some of the kings of earnestness.
And after listening to this song and watching the video, all I can think of is the debt of graditude I owe to Messrs. Cobain and Seinfeld.
RATING: 28.
Anyone born 1978 or later doesn't really remember when life was 95% regular and 5% meta (instead of the 75% to 25% split we have today). A time when irony was reserved for O Henry stories and didn't impact your life on a daily basis. And how, around 1990, that pussy Cobain and that pussy Seinfeld and others came along and killed earnestness and banished it forever. I sometimes think those of us born between 1970 and 1974 are the lucky ones, we were raised with earnestness but got irony dropped into our personalities just before it was too late, ending up with a nice mixture of each.
This song is earnest in every way imaginable. Tinkly intro. Tesh-like vocals. Ridiculously corny lyrics:
But I hope and I prayHere's a link to the video (note to people born after 1978: you'll probably be shocked to learn that the guy in the tux and the lady in lingerie aren't supposed to be funny at all).
That maybe someday
You'll walk in the room with my heart
Add and subtract
But as a matter of fact
Now that you're gone I still want you back
This song is so earnest in lyrics, vocals and music that it can challenge some of the kings of earnestness.
And after listening to this song and watching the video, all I can think of is the debt of graditude I owe to Messrs. Cobain and Seinfeld.
RATING: 28.
April 3, 2009
98. The Associates: Party Fears Two
Guy on the left! Guy on the left! These guys are Scottish, which for me makes the cover excusable for some reason. As PF500 is not Scottish, however, their inclusion of this song isn't equally excusable.
The vocals involve incredibly over-emotional warbling that dominate the song. The synthesizer in the background sometimes seems like it's part of the song; other times it feels like someone attempting to play jazz synth in the background. And the recording is the scratchy early 1980s version of lo-fi, which may or may not have been intentional. At the end of the song there are banshees or something like that.
RATING: 46.
97. Soft Cell: Tainted Love
This is one of many songs in the PF500 that I've heard sooo many times that objectively judging it might be difficult. PF500 nails the description that it gives: "electrocardiogram beep-beeps, plasticky drums, and haunting backing vocals." But there's also the bass line that you can't help but notice despite how quietly it's placed in the mix.
This is another cover that I didn't realize was a cover for many many years. Soft Cell's version was an improvement. The Gloria Jones version is *definitely* too quick and bouncy; Soft Cell's pacing is an improvement, but still probably a touch too fast.
I like the straight version, without the Baby Baby Where Did Our Love Go appended to it, much better.
RATING: 73.
This is another cover that I didn't realize was a cover for many many years. Soft Cell's version was an improvement. The Gloria Jones version is *definitely* too quick and bouncy; Soft Cell's pacing is an improvement, but still probably a touch too fast.
I like the straight version, without the Baby Baby Where Did Our Love Go appended to it, much better.
RATING: 73.
96. The Human League: Don't You Want Me
How many duets grace the PF500? Is it just this and Fairytale of New York (Pogues and Kirsty MacColl)? It might be. It seems to me that Rock N Roll duets is a space that should be explored more, particularly male/female duets. Even a shitty band like Roxette got famous using that trick (the story of Roxette is a great one; two big Swedish rock stars decide to become a duet, as if Michael Jackson and Madonna had decided in 1989 to form a supergroup). But I digress.
This truly is incredibly synthesizer heavy, and it's tempting to call it dated because of that, but it's such a perfect example of early 1980s synthesizer rock, but with the fun twist of the duet, that it really is still fun to listen to, even if the squirty or buzzy synth sounds make you wince now and again.
I've always been struck with how sick and twisted the man is in this song ("You better change it [your mind] back or we will both be sorry"?!?!? That's just one of a few of those gems in a song with a limited number of lyrics). Contrast with how reasonable and adult the woman is ("The five years we have had have been such good times"). The lyrics don't exactly match. She should be singing "Now you're starting to really scare me" or something like that.
RATING: 66.
This truly is incredibly synthesizer heavy, and it's tempting to call it dated because of that, but it's such a perfect example of early 1980s synthesizer rock, but with the fun twist of the duet, that it really is still fun to listen to, even if the squirty or buzzy synth sounds make you wince now and again.
I've always been struck with how sick and twisted the man is in this song ("You better change it [your mind] back or we will both be sorry"?!?!? That's just one of a few of those gems in a song with a limited number of lyrics). Contrast with how reasonable and adult the woman is ("The five years we have had have been such good times"). The lyrics don't exactly match. She should be singing "Now you're starting to really scare me" or something like that.
RATING: 66.
95. Scritti Politti: The 'Sweetest Girl'
PF500's explanation as to why it belongs is enough to sway the indie masses (ironic quotes, mentioning how Scritti Politti is a reference to Marxist theorist Antonio Gramsci, noting links to rappers, reggae and electronica artists and tying them to leftist Robert Wyatt).
But if you just listen to it, it has an overly produced sound, it has too many needless vocal effects, a too slow ska piano beat (note to Scritti Politti: you are not the Clash), the verses repeat themselves for no apparent reason, and that damn annoying Scritti Politti voice.
Mostly it's just boring.
RATING: 35.
But if you just listen to it, it has an overly produced sound, it has too many needless vocal effects, a too slow ska piano beat (note to Scritti Politti: you are not the Clash), the verses repeat themselves for no apparent reason, and that damn annoying Scritti Politti voice.
Mostly it's just boring.
RATING: 35.
94. Adam Ant: Kings of the Wild Frontier
When you're born in 1972, you only remember Adam Ant as a joke, a Dennis Rodman, a Billy Idol wannabe even. You didn't even know that some people took him seriously for a while.
Hearing this song, I'm not saying I love it, but I at least understand why people took him seriously. He was trying to do something non-frivolous. Two drum sets going a little crazy, a bizarre song structure with majestic melodies.
No need to channel Christgau on this one. I can just quote him:
"The music, needless to say, is rock and roll, a clever pop-punk amalgam boasting two drummers, lots of chanting, and numerous B-movie hooks. Grade: B."
Sounds about right to me.
RATING: 62.
Hearing this song, I'm not saying I love it, but I at least understand why people took him seriously. He was trying to do something non-frivolous. Two drum sets going a little crazy, a bizarre song structure with majestic melodies.
No need to channel Christgau on this one. I can just quote him:
"The music, needless to say, is rock and roll, a clever pop-punk amalgam boasting two drummers, lots of chanting, and numerous B-movie hooks. Grade: B."
Sounds about right to me.
RATING: 62.
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